Jess. I enjoy longs walks on the beach, warm blankets, and bathing in the tears of my Enemies.

 

most girls: hair done up really cute, lots of makeup, designer clothes, hipster blog, thigh gap

me: no hair, glasses, scary beard, button up shirts and porkpie hat, cooks meth to provide for my family. i am the danger. i am the one who knocks

gudnam:

jaden smith always looks like he’s trying to read off a menu from a distance

(Source: jontalbain)

jamiejedi:

piksies:

are girls still pretending they don’t masturbate?

I dunno, is society still teaching girls that anything related to their genitals is dirty and impure?

amoying:

strawberro:

strawberro:

strawberro:

owlsegg:

the-ackerman-queen:

strawberro:

LOOK WHAT MY CHEM TEACHER PUT ON MY TEST

Suuuuuuure. 

NO TEACHER WRITES LIKE THAt


THIS IS MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER NOW STOP CALLING BS 




hes showing this post to all his classes now

tell your chem teacher to change his theme

amoying:

strawberro:

strawberro:

strawberro:

owlsegg:

the-ackerman-queen:

strawberro:

LOOK WHAT MY CHEM TEACHER PUT ON MY TEST

Suuuuuuure. 

NO TEACHER WRITES LIKE THAt

THIS IS MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER NOW STOP CALLING BS 

hes showing this post to all his classes now

tell your chem teacher to change his theme

COOL NEW HACK TO GET MORE ICING FOR YOUR TOASTER STRUDEL

toasterstrudel:

  1. Obtain a significant other from a country that doesn’t sell Toaster Strudel
  2. Marry them and start a family
  3. Offer to make your fam breakfast every morning
  4. Make them strudel with no icing
  5. They’ll have no idea Toaster Strudel even come with icing
  6. Take all six packets for yourself
  7. Avoid making eye contact with your reflection in the mirror for the rest of your life because you are a monster